Dad

August 19, 2017

I woke up on August 19^th and of course, Luke was already awake.  First in my thoughts, as with each day, was a prayer for the repose of Luke’s soul.  Next my thoughts turned to those close to Luke who might need an encouraging word. I sent text messages to numerous people, both recovering and active users.  I also sent messages to those engaged in helping the addicted.  I promised to say some special prayers for each of them.  And I know that Luke also joined me in those prayers.

I dressed myself in Luke’s green Mexico shirt which he attained while serving as a missionary in Valle de Bravo, Mexico. And I also wore my green Boy Scout shorts.  Luke and I were involved in Scouts together from Tiger Cubs to him attaining the rank of Eagle Scout.

Next I joined Cathy, Erica and Elizabeth in taking Gatorade and chips to the police department.   Luke was seated beside me.  It was ironic in that 10 years ago, Luke would have fled from a police presence.  But, in fact, recently he became good friends with our neighbor who is a policeman. A connection was immediately made with the policeman at the station.  He is married to a family friend.  Our police neighbor had told me how shocked they were in finding that Luke had overdosed.  Sheepishly, he admitted that he had become somewhat immune to overdose deaths because they are so common.  But Luke’s death had shaken him. 

Our next stop was to St. Bernard Church.  Cathy, Erica, Elizabeth, Grace, and our good friend Nicola took Snickers bars to the altar server’s sacristy for the servers. Though the car was full, there was still room for Luke.  He was residing in my heart.  Luke had been an altar server.  We left a photograph from long ago of Luke, Elizabeth and I in our white albs, they as altar servers and me as a Eucharistic Minister.  Once finished, Luke, Cathy and I went into the sanctuary.  Here, before the Eucharistic Lord, is where Luke had had his conversion that totally changed his life. We prayed, and basked in the glow of Jesus Christ, our Savior. I remembered those for whom I had promised special prayers today.

Arriving at home, the kitchen was a busy place.  Luke’s favorite foods were being prepared.  For supper we had risotto and for dessert we had tiramisu.  Luke must have aided the cooks, for the dishes were every bit as good as when he had made them for us.  After supper ten of us each took turns reading passages of memoirs of Luke’s life.  I concluded in reading the final passages of Luke’s contribution to the book, Returning to the Light, the story of his addiction and recovery.  Here, he told of his desire to live in the present moment.  He expressed his desire to not miss a single opportunity to do God’s will.  Concluding, I read these final lines.

Today, I trust in God. God wants good things for me, and I want to allow Him to work through me.  So, I choose to serve.  I thank God for everything that I have lived up to this very moment. The good- the bad, it was all useful. It has brought me to exactly where I am right now, in His all-merciful and all-power hands. He has embraced me in His eternal light.

In reading these final words, I broke into sobbing tears.  Indeed, Luke is currently and certainly embraced by God’s eternal light.

After supper we took Luke to the cemetery with us.  Here his body and spirit were present.  I read from Ecclesiastes 3    

A Time for Everything

3 There is a time for everything,
    and a season for every activity under the heavens:

²     a time to be born and a time to die,
    a time to plant and a time to uproot,
³     a time to kill and a time to heal,
    a time to tear down and a time to build,
⁴     a time to weep and a time to laugh,
    a time to mourn and a time to dance,
⁵     a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,
    a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing,
⁶     a time to search and a time to give up,
    a time to keep and a time to throw away,
⁷     a time to tear and a time to mend,
    a time to be silent and a time to speak,
⁸     a time to love and a time to hate,
    a time for war and a time for peace.

We then sang Happy Birthday. We listened to and eventually sang along to Hallelujah, which would have been he and Desiree’s wedding song, but instead was Luke’s funeral song.  And we listened to Wish You Were Here, by Pink Floyd. 

Again we piled into the car, and again I had to carry Luke in my heart, for all of the seats were taken.  We prayed the Rosary for the repose of Luke’s soul, as well as for those in the throes of addiction and for those giving help to them.  Our Rosary ended just as we arrived at SpiritLife.  

SpiritLife  recovery center was our final destination for the day. It was also Luke’s true life destination.  He was their first hire.  They had been praying for someone from Cenacolo to come there and share the Cenacolo vision of recovery.  Luke began as a maintenance man but quickly became a Certified Recovery Specialist, working with the clients. Luke had been the answer to their prayer. He was also the answer to the prayers of many who found recovery with his aid.

At SpiritLife, we greeted the staff with cookies and hugs.  The hugs had a different dimension in that all the love everyone present had for Luke was squeezed into our embraces.  I felt the experiences of those touched by Luke’s outreaches. His presence was truly felt.

Arriving back at home, we played games that had been Luke’s favorites.  I continued the rivalry Luke had with his nephews in the game of Monolopy.  Others played Rummy, in memory of the long-standing tournaments between Luke and Grace. 

Throughout the day, I remembered in a special way all I had promised to offer my prayers.  Throughout the day, I was reminded of all the love and good works that Luke had freely given away in his life. 

Yes, Luke lives on.  Though he is physically gone from the earth, his spirit remains.  The goodness of his life continues to reverberate throughout the world. Luke has returned to the Light.  But the light of his life continues to shine for us all.

Happy birthday, Luke.  I am so very proud of you. I count on you remaining beside me each day.